Why am i so stupid?! I think i should kill myself?

Well...if i tell the whole story , it would probably be long enough for a book. Anyway basically about a year and a half ago i was really really quiet and i had a few good friends. I was the top of my year academically but not that many people knew who i was. I was inexperienced with boys because they werent interested. Then , i had a makeover of sorts. I suddenly had lads interested and i got a lot more confident. I was really into this one guy hu was already taken and i spent ages getting to know him until he was my absolute best friend. He dumped his gf and asked me out and i sed yeah. I sent him a picture that got spread round the whole school and everyone was talking about me loadsa people hated me for it. I went out with that boy for about five months after that and nothing major happened in my life except i was absolutely in love with him. It was all about him. When we broke up i became ridiculously depressed and i didnt no where to turn or what to do and that was nine months ago.. Im stil not over it. Over the last nine months i have done so many stupid things - hooked up with all my ex's friends, been still in love with ex and he knows it, gotten sooo soo drunk at this nightclub so that i was carried away by paramedics, had without a condom and now everyone thinks i wanted to get pregnant for attention, insulted my whole cl by accident, got suspended from school. Everyone thinks i am an absolute ''psycho''. Perhaps i am. But the depression kinda never goes away. I also got bullied for a lot of this school year aswell. Rumours are always spreading about me. Basically i need your opinions. Should i keep going? and if so, how? Like, im stil smart i just havent been studying much. How can i change everyones opinion on me? How can i make sure that every other boy isnt afraid of me. How can i forget about my ex? Maybe, I should kill myself? Help me :/